Nooooooooooo !!!!!!

We are now officially the dumbest country ever.... Congrats!!!

Defense...

It was this morning and I passed... and I still don't realize yet... I'm just waking up after my nap (I needed it so bad) and I'm still not sure it was real... The moment I have anxiously been waiting for is now over. I think it went pretty well. I probably gave the best presentation I ever gave. I was surprised by some of the questions and the light went off sometimes but I think I did ok. Overall, despites the stress, it was a really good experience and one I will never forget for sure. My advisors were awesome, pushing me in the right direction.
I feel stupid now and I'm wondering what I am going to do next. It's like if somebody just jumped on the breaks very hard... Well, honestly I know what I have to do (pack) but I am not sure I want to do it. It is going to be hard to figure out what stays here and what goes back to Europe with me. I still have a 1.5 month to spend here and I have decided to live and enjoy every second of the time I have left.

WORD SUUUUUUUUUUCKS !

That's all. I just spent half of my night trying to figure out how to have my Table of Figures match the one in the Thesis Guide... and I haven't found yet...

Forget the night...

Just got my advisor's comments on my draft... I started making 2L of tea... The night will be long... Hopefully by tomorrow morning I'll be 90% done. I'm glad I had a good WE because the next 10 days will be tough. Sometimes I'd like to be like Max, not worry about anything except the weather forecast for the next WE.

OK, let see what I can do in 12 hours (besides falling asleep on my keyboard).

How French people should play softball...

Here's a technique suggested by one of my advisor:



To avoid THAT:



No comment thanx...

Give me a break

I don't know why but I have the feeling that 2005 will be a tough year. As if my life wasn't busy and complicated enough, I have been diagnosed with pneumonia this morning. Now I know why my chest is painful and why I'm so tired even after having spent the WE resting at home. Oh yeah and D day is in 17 days... Give me a gun...

So for the next coming days, it will be 8 hours of sleep minimum (and not 6 maximum), 3 meals a day (and not 1.5), 1L of water (and not 25 cl), a break every 2 hours (and not 4 hours straight on a computer) and those pink pills that are supposed to help me get rid off this shit in my lungs.

Dad told me last January that there is always a meaning in an illness. Well I think I got it....

Anyway, I'll take it easy from now...

Mother's day

I am on campus and there is absolutely nobody. Same thing in the building. Everything is so quiet and peaceful. I'm waiting for my runs to be done to launch other ones. I won't stay very long... After all, it's sunday. Everybody is probably celebrating Mother's day in family this morning.. That's the tough part when you are an international student. You don't have your family with you to celebrate those kind of days... But hopefully Interflora works perfect ;) and let your parents remember that even if you are (very) far from them, you still think about them.

What's for today ?

Well I have done anything so far this morning... Mostly blogging and reading news. I have to go back to the lab to check my runs and make corrections on my draft. I am definitely going to take it easy today....
I checked out myblogsite.com this morning and it seems to be a little bit better than blogger. I created a new blog on blogsite mostly for files storage and work and I'll see how it goes. I am amazed to see the number of people who have a blog. I came up with mine 6 months ago and I had never realized that it was such widespread. Sometimes I wonder if people have some kind of social life anymore... ok I'm probably not the right person to say that when you consider the considerable amount of time I spend on my computer everyday... but still.... Anyway, it is pretty distracting to read what people have to say on such or such topics. And after consideration, I am not such a geek ;)
OK, time for me to grab my bag and see if the Process Analyzer crashed again...

Tough week

It's almost friday... This week has been a long long week. And a tough one as well. I'm trying to get rid off my crushes since the first day I got them... but each time I think I'm doing better I'm waking up the next morning with more pain. I'm planning on stopping thinking...
This week Max and I have presented our work to the department. I think it went well even if I'm not fully satisfied with my prestation. Jim kindly reminded me that nobody is perfect and told me that I should give myself some credits for what I am doing. He's probably right. I just have a real problem getting rid off the image of the perfect girl that is ingrained in me. I should give myself a break and stop fighting against everything that doesn't seem right. I should try to give myself a little bit of time otherwise I won't make it. I have to admit tonight that I' m totally depressed. I'm afraid I won't find again what I'm about to leave. And I am just feeling so lonely at this point. I refused to see it till now but it now appears so obvious. I guess a lot of people already experienced what I'm currently going through but I don't know who to talk with. I just have so many questions and no answer. I guess answers will come with time. Just need to be patient. Just feel like an alien for now, trying to hide behind work.